


Little Love Bug

by AGC



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Age Play, Age Regression/De-Aging, Diapers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Non-Sexual Age Play
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:55:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25249519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AGC/pseuds/AGC
Summary: Minho knew from a young age that he was different.He didn’t know exactly how he was different from others until he was much older, but there were semi-frequent instances that stuck out in his mind as odd throughout childhood.ORMinho is a Little and just wants to love and be loved.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Hwang Hyunjin/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Kim Seungmin/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Lee Felix/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Lee Minho | Lee Know & Everyone, Lee Minho | Lee Know/Everyone, Lee Minho | Lee Know/Yang Jeongin | I.N
Comments: 32
Kudos: 256





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This is my first time ever writing or posting something, so I'm sorry about it not being super polished and such because of that! I have some ideas about where I want to go with this story, but advice and constructive criticism is always appreciated! 
> 
> This first chapter is basically a prologue to the story. Hopefully the coming chapters will be a bit more interesting and entertaining to read!

Minho knew from a young age that he was different.

He didn’t know exactly how he was different from others until he was much older, but there were semi-frequent instances that stuck out in his mind as odd throughout childhood.

He remembers when he was about four years old his mother broached the topic of whether he maybe wanted a younger sister or brother and how he threw a massive, irrational temper tantrum in response. He didn’t want another baby in the house, HE was the baby and he wanted it to stay that way. Minho was definitely not okay with someone else taking his place. Fortunately, his mom was perfectly okay with having an only child, so that was the way it stayed.

He remembers crying for the whole first week of first grade because he missed his kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Kim, who would let him sit on her lap every morning and let him stay up during nap time and read to him because he had trouble sleeping even from a young age. Minho cried incessantly that first week and only ever stopped when his first grade teacher eventually gave in and called Mrs. Kim to come over and hold him until he became accustomed to the strange new environment. Minho wanted to cry during the first few days of second grade too, but by that point he had learned that crying was for babies and was not an okay thing for him to do just because he missed his first grade teacher, Mrs. Irene, who he admittedly grew very attached to after a tearful farewell to Mrs. Kim. That’s just how Minho was and still is though, someone who loves easily and has difficulty letting go.

He remembers visiting his Aunt’s and Uncle’s house for Christmas when he was nine and how after finishing dinner he grew restless sitting at his chair so his family let him leave the table to go play in his baby cousin’s room which he shared with him whenever he visited. His cousin was two and still in diapers at the time, which Minho was fascinated with, but felt confused and conflicted about for some unknown reason. His family thought it was cute how he always wanted to help change his little cousin, but Minho knew in the back of his mind that he didn’t want to help just to be nice, he was curious in a way that he felt wasn’t normal for someone his age. Minho knew no one would be coming to check on him for some time and after fighting himself for a little while, finally grabbed one of the diapers and locked himself in the connecting bathroom. He sat down on the tile floor and opened up the diaper, pretending to put in on. He couldn’t actually put it on for a number of reasons, one of the most obvious being that it was way too small for him, but he could imagine how it would feel to wear it and to his own growing horror, liked it. Quickly, before any family member decided to walk into the room and wonder why he had locked himself into the bathroom, Minho got rid of the diaper and tried to forget whatever it was he had just found out about himself.

Minho really didn’t like to think about that particular memory, instead choosing to lock it up and shove it very, very far into the darkest corners of his mind.

Another memory Minho doesn’t like to visit often is when he was thirteen and had his very first sleepover at one of his friend’s house for their birthday. Minho had never slept over at someone else’s house that wasn’t family before for a couple reasons. First, he was incredibly quiet and shy and because of that didn’t make friends very easily. Eric, the boy who invited Minho to his house, was only his “friend” because both of their moms went to college together and more than less forced them to be friendly toward one another. And second, Minho had trouble sleeping. No one really knew why he struggled so much with falling and staying asleep, but he had been that way practically his whole life and it didn’t seem like it would change anytime soon. Having his stuffed animal, Snowy, by his side every night helped somewhat to allow him to get a good nights rest though. 

Minho’s grandmother had gifted Snowy the polar bear to him when he was three years old and he had slept with him every night since. He couldn’t imagine falling asleep without rubbing the soft white fur of his stuffed animal against his face and rubbing the silky pink bow wrapped around its neck between his fingers, which made it that much more surprising to realize he actually was much too old to be sleeping with one. Minho arrived to the sleepover holding his backpack with his pajamas and toothbrush and Eric’s birthday present in one hand and Snowy in the other and immediately knew he had done something wrong when Eric’s mother led him to where the other boys had congregated around the living room TV and they all stared at him like he had two heads.

Minho quickly learned why after Eric’s mother had left the room to go prepare the boys snacks in the kitchen and he had immediately been bombarded with questions and accusations as to why he was clutching a baby toy protectively to his chest. Minho, confused and scared, didn’t put up much of a fight against one of Eric’s bigger friends when he snatched Snowy from his arms and ran off to hide it. Minho spent most of the evening sticking quietly to the corner of the sofa and trying desperately not to start crying.

Minho was unable to sleep at all that night and when it was time to go home the next morning he felt incredibly relieved. Timidly, he approached Eric to ask him where Snowy was hidden, but was once again met with only cruel and harsh words. All but pushing Minho out the door, Eric told that he was doing him a favor in helping him to grow up. Minho didn’t feel like he was being given a favor, but not wanting to pick a fight he decided it would just be better to go home and find some semblance of much need comfort in the familiairity there. 

When Minho’s mom asked why there were tear tracks running down his flushed cheeks and where Snowy was when he arrived home later that morning, he lied and said he tripped and dropped him into a steep ditch off the side of the road where construction was going on outside their neighborhood.

It was two whole months of barely sleeping before Minho accidentally found a temporary solution. He had gone to bed the night before fully prepared to be restlessly tossing and turning for the majority of the night, but had miraculously woken up feeling somewhat refreshed and better. It only took him a few moments to realize why, however, after looking down and seeing his thumb in his mouth. Minho felt ashamed at such a babyish action, but he was also desperate to finally be able to sleep for a whole night. After another few nights of determinedly keeping his hands glued to his side and little to no sleep, he begrudgingly accepted the temporary solution until he found a better way to handle the problem. He just made sure to lock the door every night to ensure that no one could walk in and find him sucking his thumb like a toddler.

It was another few years before Minho found dance and while it wasn’t a solution to help him sleep better at night, it did help calm the ever growing chaos of his thoughts. Dancing, Minho quickly realized, was something he could never separate himself from because it was somehow a part of him. Finding dance was like finding a piece of himself that had always existed that he had just simply not yet discovered until then.

Not only did Minho love to dance, he was gifted at it too. Dance opened doors for Minho that he didn’t even known existed. And at first, Minho was more than happy with just dancing on stage with others, even if the focus wasn’t on him. Eventually, however, he realized it wasn’t enough. As happy as he was just dancing, he wanted to be seen like the singers he danced behind were seen. 

Minho wanted to be an idol. And against all odds, that dream became an actual possibility with Stray Kids.

It was was when Minho was eliminated and experiencing the darkest moment of his life that he realized what he was. After being told he was cut from the final lineup he felt as though he had been brutally shattered into a million tiny pieces. After saying goodbye to the people who he had already began seeing as family he went home, wrapped his body in the softest blankets he owned, curled into himself as much as he physically could, and finally let himself cry his heart out in the way he had yearned to do for so long. The years of pent up emotions, stress and forced self-control came bursting out in an uncontrollable fit of heart wrenching sobs. He had always known he was different in a way that he couldn't describe from those around him and in that moment he convinced himself that JYP could somehow see that piece of him and cast him out because of it. Determined, he set out to finally find out what exactly it was that set him apart from the rest. It didn't take Minho more than an hour of thoroughly searching on the internet to discover it. 

It did not make Minho feel any better to put name to the way he had felt for so many years. In fact, being aware of it made it worse. With shame and disgust coursing through his body, Minho decided that no one could ever know what he was and that he was going to prove to JYP that he neither accepted nor acknowledged that part of himself. And though Minho was finally able to prove himself as worthy enough to be a member of Stray Kids to JYP, that secret part of him he ignored had nothing to do with the matter.

On March 25, 2018 Minho officially debuted with Stray Kids.

Unfortunately for Minho, fame changed almost every part of his life apart from what he wanted to change the most. Minho was a little, and no matter how much he hated and denied it, he could never escape from it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I apologize in advance for any errors! Also, any feedback or opinions about how this story should go is appreciated!

Chan realized that Minho is different within the first week of meeting him. 

While Minho can certainly be aloof and a little cold at times, Chan had known practically from the start that that side of Minho is more of a front than anything. Minho is kind and silly and wears his heart on his sleeve, more so than is to be expected of his image. It wasn’t until much later, though, that Chan started to wonder what exactly it was that made Minho so different from the rest. 

All the members are special in their own little way, but for some reason that Chan couldn’t quite pinpoint Minho stood out as being especially different, so much so that Chan unconsciously treated him a certain way because of it- more cautiously, gentler even. After Chan, Minho is the eldest member in Stray Kids, yet, as the months passed after their debut and as Minho gradually let his guard down around the other members Chan couldn’t help but think of him as the baby of the group. Because while Jeongin is the youngest as far as actual age, he certainly has never lived up to the title. Not like how Minho does, at least. With Minho, Chan can’t help but to fuss.

Jeongin seldom tolerates any form of physical affection and when he does it's never for very long. In comparison, even though Minho is rarely the one to initiate it, Chan can tell that he truly loves skin-ship and is never happier than when one of the members chooses to cuddle up next to him on movie nights. It’s on one such night that happened a few weeks back that pushes Chan to begin asking questions about whether or not he really knows Minho at all.

It was Hyunjin’s turn to pick what they watched and he had chosen some cheesy rom-com that nearly everyone had groaned at when he declared it to be his final choice after scrolling through the list of options for what seemed liked hours. Normally, the kids would bicker a bit over the selection, but they were all so exhausted from preparing for their upcoming comeback that they gave in with relatively little complaint. Minho was already half-asleep by the time the movie started playing, securely plastered to Chan’s side with one leg over Chan’s own and head tucked into his neck. Minho’s body was practically a human heater, but Chan would never in a million years complain. Moments like these are Chan's favorite because they’re reminders that Minho trusts him enough to be vulnerable with him. So yeah, Chan could live with feeling slightly overheated if it meant being able to hold Minho in his arms for a few precious hours.

For the first half of the movie, nothing particularly memorable happened. It wasn’t until the movie was wrapping up and when Minho was fast asleep curled up like a content cat against Chan that something peculiar occurred. Chan was idly running his hand up and down Minho’s side when he began to hear a strange snuffling sound coming from where Minho’s head was resting right under his own. After briefly looking down a bit, Chan was met with the sight of Minho’s hand tightly clutching his t-shirt against his chest, nothing out of the norm. But, after awkwardly craning his neck a but more, Chan could see that Minho had his thumb in his mouth and that the strange sound from earlier was from him sucking on it. 

Several thoughts were bouncing around Chan’s head at once and at that moment all he could do was stare. After pushing back the initial emotions of shock and surprise and looking closer, Chan couldn't help but notice that Minho looked at peace with his long eyelashes fluttering slightly and face absent of any tension. Chan began hesitantly brushing his finger over Minho’s small hand still tightly gripped onto his shirt before moving up to start gently brushing his knuckles across his high cheekbone. At that moment, still unable to take his eyes off of Minho’s sleeping face, all Chan could think was, “How strange.”

It was so strange to watch Minho’s face, not just because he was sucking his thumb, but because for once his brow wasn’t furrowed and his nose wasn’t scrunched up. He wasn’t softly whining or fidgeting to get into a more comfortable position. No, Minho was sleeping as serenely as Chan had ever seen him sleep.

It was no secret among the members that Minho struggled to sleep well. With them all living practically on top of one another, it was nearly impossible for something like that to be kept a secret for very long. None of the members had ever really questioned Minho about it before, assuming that if Minho wanted to talk about it he would approach one of them. Chan had only tried to bring it up once before after witnessing Minho toss and turn every night and slowly becoming more and more worried that Minho’s health was suffering because of it. He was quickly shut down by Minho, however, and been repeatedly assured that- yes, Minho has always been this way- no, nothing can fix it, and finally- for the love of god, Chan, stop fussing!

Chan hadn’t brought it up after that and was stuck watching Minho’s nightly struggles until roommates were switched and Minho started to sleep in Han’s room. Chan’s worries only ever lessened after peeking his head into Minho’s and Han’s shared room one night and finding them sleeping together on Minho’s bed, with Minho seeming to sleep significantly better with their legs tangled together and arms pinned between their two bodies. Chan checked their room semi-regularly from then on and more often than not he found that Han had crawled into Minho’s bed again. It wasn’t difficult to piece together after that that Minho simply needed another body pressed against his own in order to fall asleep. Whether Han knew what he was doing or not Chan wasn’t sure, but from what he gathered Minho never approached someone to sleep with him, and the nights that Han didn’t decide to join Minho for whatever reason, Minho slept restlessly. Chan was curious about why Minho never sought anyone out, and he was more than a little disappointed over the fact that Minho had never made an effort to seek HIM out at all, especially after being roommates for so long. But, all the members respected one another’s privacy and he really didn’t want to make Minho uncomfortable, so he rarely thought about it from then on. Never on all those nights of checking in on Minho, however, had Chan seem him sucking on his thumb. 

None of the other members had noticed what was going on, with Hyunjin still engrossed in the movie playing on their TV and the rest of the members either half-asleep or fully asleep themselves. Chan had started to nod off as well until he had heard the gentle sucking noises coming from Minho. With his thumb in his mouth and face free of any stress or discomfort, Minho looked so young, and Chan couldn’t help but think how adorable it was. Cooing softly to himself, Chan was still admiring Minho when the movie ended.

Chan was brought back to the present as the kids began slowly getting up and making their way to their rooms for the night. He was pretty sure that the living room was dark enough that if anyone looked his and Minho’s way they wouldn’t see anything more than Minho cuddled up against Chan, but just to be safe, Chan pulled the blanket he and Minho had been sharing since the start of the movie up higher and turned Minho’s body in closer to his chest. While Chan still wasn’t sure what exactly was going on, he knew that Minho probably wanted to keep whatever it was a secret. 

After the last of the boys had said their goodnights and Chan and Minho were alone, Chan finally allowed himself to relax. Looking down on Minho once more, Chan couldn’t help but wish that Minho let him see this part of himself more. Anyone could see clear as day that Chan’s protective fatherly instincts ran deep, especially around his members. But at that moment, holding Minho in his arms cuddled up close to his body with him sweetly sucking his thumb, Chan had never felt more at home. Almost as if this is where Minho should have been all along.

Deciding that it would be best for both Minho and himself to sleep in an actual bed, Chan carefully untangled himself from Minho before gingerly lifting him up into his arms, all while making sure not to dislodge his thumb from his mouth. With Minho still wrapped up in the couch blanket and safely cocooned in Chan’s arms, he made his way into his bedroom. Chan knew that his own roommate, Changbin, was likely sharing Hyunjin’s bed for the night and that left Chan’s room empty. While Chan briefly thought about carrying Minho into his shared room with Han, he knew that he would’t be able to bring himself to move Minho’s thumb from his mouth. If Minho slept with Chan, he wouldn’t need to worry about anyone else seeing Minho like this. 

After making the decision that it would be best for Minho to sleep with him for the night, Chan softly laid Minho down on his bed before sliding underneath the covers as well. His own selfish desire to keep Minho close to him aside, Chan was positive that Minho would sleep better with him than in Changbin’s empty bed all alone. 

As Chan made himself comfortable, he began thinking about all the other little things that Minho does that has stood out to him as being a tad unusual. For one, Minho has a funny habit of playfully biting the other members. He also has a weakness for all things soft, and while that isn't strange in and of itself, Minho is completely unable to resist running his hands over every soft looking blanket or sweater he sees. Not to mention the pouty lips and babyish whine he puts on whenever he’s trying to convince one of the members to give him back-scratches. 

Yet, for every time Minho giggled a little too high-pitched and childish then was to be expected or pulled a member impossibly close to himself to cuddle, it never took long after for him to almost shut down in a way. In fact, now that Chan was thinking about it after almost every one of those strange little incidences Minho reacted negatively shortly thereafter, whether that be by hiding away and paying attention to nothing and nobody but his phone or by coldly shrugging off a member’s affection. It was almost as if he was punishing himself.

Or hiding something.

Looking over at Minho’s sleeping form once more and reassuring himself that, yes, he’s still breathing evenly, Chan resolves to do some research the next morning before finally allowing himself to fall asleep.

Despite Chan being determined to find an explanation for all of Minho’s odd little behaviors, they were still in the middle of preparing for their new comeback. As such, the following morning turns into the following week, and the following week turns into the following month before Chan at last finds some spare time to look into the matter. 

With the other members out for dinner and the dorm to himself, Chan sat down at his desk and again thought back to the morning after he had brought Minho back to bed with him. He had woken up alone, but with the spot next to him still warm from Minho's body. It wasn’t terribly unusual that Minho had already gotten up considering that he tended to be an early riser, but something still felt off. Chan didn’t want to bring up what he had seen to Minho until he knew more about what it was that Minho was hiding. And he was hiding something. In fact, the more Chan thought about it, the more he felt that Minho was keeping a secret from him and the rest of the group. But why? Chan couldn’t imagine that anything Minho was hiding was so horrible that it was worth keeping it from his family.

With all that in mind, Chan began to dig through the trenches of the internet. And it didn’t take too terribly long for him to find the answer he was unknowingly searching for all this time.

Minho is a little.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have any suggestions as to how you'd like to see this story go, please feel free to leave it in the comments down below!

“Minho, can we talk?”

If it was anyone besides Chan, Minho would have been surprised at someone else still being up at such an hour. Still, Minho was not at all prepared when he found Chan sitting on his bed after coming home from the dance studio. Even during their break, Minho had refused to slow down, constantly at either vocal or dance practice until the early hours of the morning. And while part of the reason he was pushing himself so hard was to improve his skills, the main motivator was fear. Fear of if he paused even for a moment, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from what he had avoided for so so long. He wouldn’t be able to stop himself from feeling little.

Because ever since he woke up that morning a month ago cuddled up against Chan with his head resting on his chest, thumb still in his mouth, Minho had begun spiraling down. Shock, horror, and self-disgust were all coursing through Minho the moment he became aware of his surroundings and realized he was in Chan’s bed. Yet, even as Minho became steadily more stressed out he couldn’t help but find the comfort he had been craving for so long in listening to Chan’s heart steadily beating beneath the warm chest he was lying on.

Minho had been secretly yearning for this kind of warmth and sense of safety he had been denying himself for years. For as long as he can remember he had either consciously or unconsciously been pushing down the need to be little inside of him, blocking the desires out of his mind and ignoring it to the best of his abilities. But at that moment, those walls inside of him began to crack and Minho could feel himself slipping. 

Before he could even begin to process all the emotions surging through his head, Minho sprung up from Chan’s bed and quickly made his way into the hall bathroom, making sure to lock the door behind him. Needing a distraction, Minho shed his clothes as fast as he could and hopped into the shower, turning the temperature down as low as it could go. Standing under the freezing water, he let the burning cold dominate his focus as he reoriented his thoughts.

He could not be little, Minho reminded himself. Not now, not ever. Because if he slipped, one of the members would inevitably find out and they would no doubt hate him for it. Minho wasn’t sure if they would kick him out of the group, but they would certainly not want to be his family anymore. And Minho knew that he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he lost his family because of some stupid part of him he couldn’t manage to keep in check. 

Even with the heavy feeling of self-hatred weighing down on Minho, as the weeks passed he felt himself wanting to slip more and more. He didn’t know exactly why, but he could no longer control his little side as effectively as he had before. Maybe it was because he had gotten a tiny glimpse of what his life could be like if he let himself drop, but regardless, Minho had to stop it. So logically, he threw himself into work. 

From the moment he woke up to the time he went to bed, Minho practiced. Hard. Because the all-encompassing exhaustion that came with tiring himself out so thoroughly was the only deterrence from those dangerous thoughts taking over. He knew the other members were worried about him, that they were concerned over how intensely he was pushing himself. Because while all the members are passionate and work insanely hard, Minho was taking it to a whole other level. And as the circles under his eyes grew darker and his face wearier, Minho could tell that Chan was troubled most by his actions out of all of them.

Minho felt as though Chan was watching him constantly. He could feel his eyes on him at dinner, practice, and practically everywhere else they went. The thought that Chan had somehow figured out his secret crossed Minho’s mind more than once, but was dismissed every time. Minho figured that if Chan knew, he would have confronted Minho earlier on about it. He reasoned to himself that if Chan had seen him sucking on his thumb like an overgrown baby he would have already been told to get out, or at the very least, to stay the hell away from the other members.

Han had told Minho that afternoon the he was planning on sleeping in Felix’s room that night, so when Minho walked into his room thinking he would be met with two empty beds, he was not at all ready to see Chan sitting awkwardly on his comforter. 

Chan turned to face him as soon as he heard the door creak open, and Minho could’t help but be reminded of the day of his elimination. Chan’s expression, a mixture of sadness, regret, and confusion, was nearly identical to the one he wore when JYP announced that Minho wasn’t good enough to be a part of Stray Kids. That face is how Minho knew that Chan had found out. Minho was frozen in place at the door, and as the ground seemed to disappear from beneath his feet, all he could think was, ‘This is it. This is the moment it all comes crashing down.’

Not taking his eyes off of Minho, who seemed paralyzed with something Chan could only suspect was dread, he patted the place next to him, indicating for Minho to sit down. With a heavy heart, Minho robotically made his way over, making sure to keep a decent amount of space between himself and Chan on the bed. Minho’s head was turned down, staring blankly at his lap, and before Chan could even open his mouth to begin to explain Minho frantically exclaimed, “Please don’t hate me Chan! Please! I can be normal! None of the other members ever have to know that there’s something wrong with me!”

The pre-prepared speech that Chan had been practicing while waiting for Minho to arrive back home quickly went out of his head the moment he heard Minho’s panicked plea. Minho was still refusing to meet Chan’s eyes, so as cautiously as he could to not startle the already distraught boy, he lifted Minho’s chin up to face him and said, “Hate you? Minho, there is nothing you could ever do or say or be that could make me hate you.”

Minho’s eyes were still threatening to spill over with tears as he said, “You-you know. I know you know w-what I am. I-I’m disgusting, you should hate me.” 

Minho had barely finished speaking before the tears started to fall, faster and faster as the silence between them grew. Thinking over how best to communicate how untrue what Minho had just said was, Chan realized that clearly, words alone weren’t going to work. So, shifting closer, Chan pulled Minho into his lap and wrapped him in the tightest hug he could. And that was all it took for Minho to finally break. 

With sobs wracking his body, Minho’s protests were diminished to weak pushes against Chan’s embrace. But Chan didn’t let go, if anything, he only held Minho tighter, all the while murmuring gentle reassurances into Minho’s hair that he loved him, that he wasn’t going anywhere, and that there was nothing to be ashamed of. After half an hour of gently rocking Minho until he had thoroughly cried himself out, Chan finally loosened his grip on him to get a better look at his face. 

Minho’s eyes and cheeks were red and tear tracks ran down the length of his face that Chan quickly wiped away with his thumb. And with one arm still holding Minho in his lap, Chan reached for the tissues sitting on the nightstand, grabbing one and holding it to Minho’s nose with the soft instruction to blow. 

Chan’s unexpected gentleness and kindness were almost enough to renew Minho’s crying fit were it not for Chan tenderly saying, “Sweetheart, you’re going to make yourself sick.”

It took another few more minutes of Chan continuously running soothing circles on Minho’s back to get him to calm down again. But at last, Minho, who was still turned sideways on Chan’s lap, was able to face Chan. Sniffling quietly, Chan could barely hear it when Minho shyly whispered, “I’m a little.”

Chan was still struggling to get Minho’s eyes to meet his own as he replied, “I know. It took me a while to figure out, but I knew you were hiding something since I carried you to bed with me that night.”

Minho, despite already knowing the the answer to his question, still asked, “You saw?”

“You sucking your thumb?” Chan clarified, “Yeah, I did.” And before Minho could begin pulling away with embarrassment, Chan added, “It was really cute.”

Slowly, Minho repeated, “I-It was cute?”

Chucking slightly, Chan admitted, “Yeah, it was. That’s why I brought you to bed with me that night. Because I couldn’t bring myself to let you go. I just wanted to keep holding you.” Minho, who was in a bit of shock from Chan’s response, finally began registering that he was still being cradled in Chan’s lap. And Chan, seeming to already know what Minho was thinking, said, “I don’t want to let you go now either.”

“Why?” Minho suddenly asked. Chan looked a little confused at the question, trying to read Minho’s face to understand what he was really asking. Sensing that Chan was unsure what he meant, Minho spoke up again to make himself clear, “Why are you okay with all of this? You looked so upset when I walked in, so, I guess what I’m asking is why are you being so nice to me?”

Moving Minho to straddle his lap and face him directly, Chan said, “Because I love you, and I want you to be happy. You’re not hurting anyone or yourself by allowing yourself to be little. I was only upset over the fact that you felt like you needed to keep being a little a secret from me and the rest of the members. I was, and still am, sad about you feeling the need to hide something that is a part of who you are.” 

Again, a little startled by Chan’s easy acceptance, Minho asked, “Do you even know what that really means? To allow myself to be little?”

“Yes,” is all Chan said, “I do.” And it was true, Chan had done extensive research before coming to Minho, wanting to make sure he truly understood what everything meant. And the more Chan learned, the more he fell in love with the idea of taking care of Minho as a little. Caregivers and their importance were one of the first aspects of little space that Chan had stumbled upon, and reading about their role and responsibility made something click inside of Chan. He had always had strong caregiver instincts, even without knowing what little space was, and learning more about it made Chan realize that this was something he had always wanted- to take care of another person, and to have that person fully depend on him in return. 

Chan knew that Minho had been denying his little side for quite some time, maybe all his life, and that it was starting to have serious repercussions on his wellbeing. And because Chan knew Minho hadn’t allowed himself to drop, he figured it was pretty safe for him to assume that he also didn’t have a caregiver. With that in mind, Chan asked, “And if you’d let me, I’d like to be your caregiver.”

Minho, who was until then deep in thought over the fact that Chan both knew about little space AND acted as though he was perfectly fine with it, just said, “You want to be my what?”

“Your caregiver,” Chan reiterated. “I know you’ve been fighting this side of you for so long, and we both know it’s not healthy. You need to drop, and it would be much safer to have someone to watch over you when you did. It doesn’t have to be me, if you think that little you would be more comfortable with someone else then that’s okay, I won’t be mad, but I’d like it to be.” 

Chan was still carefully watching Minho’s face to gauge his response when Minho finally said, “I-ah, I don’t know if you know this, but, like, not all littles are the same age.” Chan, who did in fact know this and had a feeling of where this was going, simply nodded for Minho to continue. “And, I-uhm, well I’m kinda on the younger side of the spectrum.” 

By the end, Minho’s ears were red and he was making a face as if he once again thought Chan would be disgusted by him, but all Chan said was, “That’s okay. I was hoping you’d be really little anyways. I love babies, and you don’t have to be worried that I don’t know what I’m doing. My mom taught me how to change my younger sibling’s diapers when I was younger and I-” Chan was abruptly cut off my Minho slapping his hand over his mouth, looking mortified and aghast by the insinuation. Chan only quirked one eyebrow in response before gently grabbing Minho’s wrist and bringing it away from his face before asking, “What’s wrong? You were saying that you were really young while in headspace, so I just figured you would need diapers. Do you not?”

Minho, still not over the fact that Chan was talking about changing his diapers in the future, only stuttered in response, “I-well, maybe? I don’t know! But do you really have to say it like-like that!”

Chan, who was growing ever the more amused at Minho’s shyness, asked, “How would you like me to say it, then?”

At that point, Minho was more than a little exasperated at Chan’s bluntness and nearly full on pouting as he said, “You know what I mean! Like I-like I’m some baby!”

Smiling at Minho’s cuteness and unable to keep himself from teasing him just a little, Chan’s only response was, “What? Do you not want to be my baby?”

Minho turned beet red at Chan’s choice of words and at that moment all he could bring himself to do was hide his face in Chan’s shoulder. Chan chuckled lightly at the little action, lightly patting and rubbing Minho’s back in apology to get him to look at him once again. 

Minho’s face was still shoved in Chan’s shoulder blade as he whispered, “I-yes, I want to be your baby.”

Unable to keep the giant grin off his face, Chan just held Minho tightly to him as he said, “Good. You have no idea how happy that makes me to hear.” 

And with Minho still clinging to him, Chan resolved that he would do everything in his power to show Minho that it was okay for him to be little, and how happy he was to be his caregiver. It was Chan’s turn to blush, then, as he thought to himself that someday, he might even be able earn enough of Minho’s trust to be considered as more than just his ‘caregiver’.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! And please feel free to leave suggestions in the comments down below! Constructive criticism is always appreciated!

Despite Chan’s desire for Minho to slip as soon as possible, they and the rest of the group had already planned week-long trips home during their break between comebacks. Not to mention, Minho had absolutely no little supplies. Minho was very insistent that he didn’t need anything, but Chan was not about to allow that to happen. Based off everything he had read online, Chan had already started formulating a lengthy shopping list of things to buy, and without knowing Minho’s likes and dislikes yet, he figured that it was better to be safe than sorry.

The first thing on Chan’s list of necessities was a comfort object for Minho, and knowing his affinity for all things soft, he easily picked out online a little cream bunny with long floppy ears and a pink nose. Chan could already imagine Minho sweetly clutching his stuffed animal to his chest, small fingers rubbing the bunny’s silky fur between them.

They had agreed the night Chan had asked to be Minho’s caregiver that after they got back they would make time for Minho to be able to regress, and to say that Chan was looking forward to it would be an understatement. He was only on the second day of vacation with Changbin’s family before he began itching to get back to the dorms to spend time with little Minho. And because the members had already agreed to switch rooms upon their return, it wasn’t difficult for them to engineer for Minho to once again be sharing with Chan.

Minho, on the other hand, was freaking out bit. He may trust Chan with his life and had no doubt Chan would make a great caregiver, after all he had all the positive attributes of one, but he couldn’t help the nagging in the back of his mind that he would be too much, too little. Even as the thought filled his mind he knew, logically, that that wouldn’t be the case. Chan had made it clear that he wanted, preferred even, for Minho to be a particularly young little. Minho knew that he was just getting in his own head, yet he still couldn’t help the self-consciousness he was feeling over finally letting himself drop. Especially because he could feel that once he did, he would have no control over how young he would be.

Minho hadn’t really allowed himself to think about it before, but now that he was actually going to let himself regress, he couldn’t help but wish his headspace would be different. Older. Whenever he thought about it, memories of Chan talking about diapers always came to mind and each time Minho could never manage to stop the blush from rising to his cheeks. As much as Minho was mortified over the idea of Chan seeing him like that, he couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like. Because no matter how embarrassed Minho was over it, it never changed the fact that he desperately wanted all the "babyish" things Chan had been trying to talk to him about. 

Minho luckily didn’t have much time to overthink and get worked up over it, because the day he was set to arrive back to the dorms had come quicker than he expected, and with Chan having already arrived the day before, he knew that Chan was ready and waiting for him to regress that day. Minho knew that Chan had been preparing, and while he had gladly let Chan pick everything out for him, he had to admit that he was feeling more than a little excited about what Chan had chosen. 

None of the other members had come back yet besides Changbin, who was out with friends watching a movie, so Minho knew they had the dorm to themselves as he made his way to his and Chan’s room. Opening the door, he saw Chan on the ground fussing with some boxes. Minho normally would have tried to sneak a peek into what was inside them, but upon hearing Minho come in, Chan immediately stopped messing with the presents he was still trying to hide and got up to pull him into a hug. Chan could feel that Minho was stiff in his arms, and leaning back to face him he could see the apprehension written on his face. 

Lifting one hand up to cradle Minho’s face in his palm, Chan said, “We don’t have to do this today if you aren’t ready. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable doing something that should be relaxing for you.”

Minho’s eyes widened at that, quickly saying “No! No, I want to do this. I guess I’m just nervous 'cause I don’t really know how to do this. I’ve never been, like, little before you know?” By the end of him assuring Chan that he was okay, Minho was compulsively rubbing his fingers together, something Chan had noticed he does when feeling stressed or anxious.

Chan had been looking into and thinking about how to talk Minho down, and knowing that it wouldn’t be easy for the younger to finally let go of his inhibitions, he decided that letting Minho unwind in the way he did most naturally would be best. So taking Minho’s hands in his own larger ones, Chan said, “Well, let’s start with what you normally do to relax. What would that be?” 

After thinking for a bit, Minho hesitantly said, “Um, I guess I like to take baths when I’m stressed. But you don’t have to-I mean, you don’t need to help me with-you know…that.” Minho’s face was again looking flushed and he was once more trying to avoid making any eye contact with Chan. 

Sighing to himself, Chan said, “I know I don’t need to, but I want to. Minho, I’m going to say this as many times as I need to in order to get this in your head. I WANT to help you. Not just because I’m your leader and I feel responsible for your wellbeing, but because I genuinely enjoy taking care of you like this.” Chan’s grip on Minho’s hands strengthened as he went on, and by the end he was holding them up to his heart.

Minho’s cheeks weren’t any less rosy after Chan’s admission, but he did manage to look Chan in the face as he said, “O-oh, well, okay then.” And Chan’s bright grin at the small acceptance was enough to get a timid smile from Minho in response. Clapping his hands together once, Chan announced, “Now, let’s get you in the bath. Yeah?” After getting a slight nod from Minho, Chan continued to say “Okay, come on baby let’s get you all squeaky clean,” before gently ushering Minho to the bathroom.

Minho was still standing awkwardly by the vanity sink as Chan began filling the tub. And it was only after running his hands underneath the stream of water to make sure it was a comfortable temperature that Chan noticed Minho still at the threshold of the bathroom door and asked, “Wanna sit on the toilet seat while I fill the bath babes?” 

Shuffling his feet over to sit down, Minho watched Chan for a while before starting to speak up and ask, “Can I-never mind.“ The moment Chan had looked his way Minho had lost any nerve he had. He had just began picking at the skin by his fingernails before they were swiftly encompassed by steady hands and stopped.

Moving to crouch between Minho’s legs, Chan voice was firm, but warm as he said, “Can you what? Baby, you know you don’t need to be shy around me. You can ask me anything. I won’t make fun of you, ever.” And with the encouraging prompting of Chan’s hands gently squeezing his own, Minho finally managed to ask, “Can- can I maybe have bubbles? Please?”

Smiling widely, Chan said, “What nice manners, baby! Yes, of course you can have bubbles. How silly of me to forget!” And with that reached for the lavender bubble bath he had bought recently out from underneath the sink. It was nearly impossible to not notice how well Minho had responded to the little praise he had received, so when Chan said, “Okay, arms up for me," he made sure to add on, "Good boy!” when Minho obediently lifted his arms for Chan to take off his shirt. After tickling Minho’s bare sides to pull out a giggle from the shy boy, Chan tapped Minho’s legs twice to indicate for him to stand up. Making sure to not take any more time than necessary, Minho held onto Chan’s shoulders for balance as he quickly slid Minho’s pants and underwear down before helping him to carefully step into the bath. Minho all but melted as he sat down and Chan, laughing slightly at how quickly the tension in Minho’s body and face seemed to fade way, asked, “Does that feel good baby?” Other than giving him a small smile and hum, Minho just slunk further under the warm water in response.

With their normally hectic schedules, it had been a long time since Minho was able to relax like this. With the steam slowly fogging up the mirrors and Chan’s watchful, comforting gaze over him, Minho was finally at peace. He hadn’t truly realized it until he was away for an extended period of time, but he loved Chan’s constant, invisible presence in his life. He had never had someone who wasn’t family be such a stable, important figure before, and though he considered all Stray Kids members to be family, Chan was special. Chan was someone who he looked up to as someone who always seemed to just inherently know what to do in every situation. And right now, he was certainly living up to that part of his character.

Calmly swirling a now soapy washcloth through the bathwater, Chan seemed content to simply watch Minho unwind. It wasn’t until Minho seemed seconds away from falling asleep that Chan began gently running the cloth over his body. Beginning with his shoulders, Chan methodically washed Minho until there was no part of him that didn’t smell of honey and shea butter before reaching up to start massaging his hair. Watching Minho playfully pat at the bubbles, making little mountains out of them before flattening them out and starting over again, Chan made a mental note to buy some bath toys for the future. Slowly leaning Minho’s shoulders back after rubbing in the shampoo, Chan carefully cupped Minho’s face to keep any soap from getting in his eyes before rinsing everything out. 

It was far from the first time Chan had seen Minho naked, and with the bubbles covering the majority of the surface and protecting his modesty, Minho was more than willing and pliant in Chan’s hands, looking more carefree than Chan had seen him in months. Perhaps ever. Minho was still leaning into his touch when Chan deemed Minho thoroughly washed and clean. He was hesitant to disturb the state of tranquility Minho was in, but seeing his fingers already begin to prune, he decided it was time for Minho to get out of the bath.

Subtly motioning for Minho to sit up more, Chan pulled the plug in the tub to start draining the water out before grabbing a fresh towel and quickly wrapping Minho up in it. Getting Minho to stand up was a harder task than Chan had anticipated, with the boy seemingly completely unwilling to hold up his own weight without resting against Chan. Realizing that any attempt to get Minho to stand on his own would be futile and could potentially reverse any progress they had made in getting him to slip, Chan mindfully supported his weight as he toweled him off.

It was when Chan was drying off the bottom of Minho’s legs with the boy practically folded in half over Chan’s shoulders as he kneeled down to reach his feet that Chan decided a nap was in order. Making sure to grab the clothes Minho was wearing earlier, Chan bundled Minho up in the towel once more before picking him up and setting him on his hip. Chan internally thanked his past self for working out and allowing him to be able to lift Minho so easily as the boy sweetly rested his head in the crook of Chan’s shoulders, his wet hair tickling Chan’s face as he walked.

After Chan gently settled Minho down on his bed, pressing one hand lightly down on his stomach to indicate for him to ‘stay’, he went over to their shared closet to grab some supplies. Chan was anticipating some reluctance at this part, and hoping that Minho would continue to stay spaced out, he placed a diaper and some cream by the towel Minho was still passively lying on. Seeing what Chan had brought, Minho began to fuss, wriggling around on his back as if making to get away and softly whining in protest. 

Expecting this, Chan began trying to pacify Minho, running his hands up and down his sides and petting his damp hair back. The tender touches and hushing seemed to temporarily calm Minho, who was looking up at Chan with glistening eyes. Smiling softly, Chan continued to coo down at Minho’s uneasy looking face before saying, “I know. Shhh, I know baby. This is pretty scary for you, huh? But we both know you’re too little to not have protection. Channie just wants whats best for his baby, and right now that’s for you to wear this diaper, okay? I promise I’ll be real quick.”

Minho was still snuffling slightly as he whispered, “No thank you, please. No diaper. I’m still big, don’t need." Chan had to hold Minho down to make sure he did't fall off the bed as the boy began twisting away with renowned effort. Letting out a soft sigh, Chan paused for a moment to think of how to ease Minho's trepidation before reaching over to the head of the bed and grabbing the bunny he had bought for Minho that had been resting between the pillows. Holding the stuffed animal up for Minho to clearly see, he said, “What if you had a friend to keep you company while you’re being such a brave little boy for me? Will you let me change you then?” Chan knew then that he had made the right choice in buying the stuffed bunny as Minho’s eyes went directly to it, gazing at it with clear want and adoration. Chan handed the bunny over to Minho after he halted his struggling and started making grabby hands toward the toy. And with Minho’s focus entirely fixated on the soft plushie, Chan began to get to work with getting the diaper on him. He wasn’t lying earlier when he said that he had practice changing diapers with his younger siblings, and soon enough Minho was comfortably padded before he even noticed what was going on. It was only after Chan had taped the last side of the diaper down that Minho seemed to realize what had happened. Looking down with no little surprise, Minho traced the stars and planets adorning the diaper hugging his small waist. 

After leaning down to blow a raspberry on his tummy and exclaiming, "See? That wasn't so bad was it, baby?" Chan couldn’t stop the fond smile from spreading across his face as Minho let out a fit of high-pitched giggles at the action, batting away Chan's face. Despite the bit of resistance he was showing earlier, the happy little kicks and squirms and the untroubled look on Minho’s face told Chan that he was right in pushing Minho a little with this. Minho was still hugging his new bunny to his chest and admiring the pattern on his diaper when Chan picked him up again, patting him bottom as he made his way to their closet once more. 

Chan hadn’t taken more than two steps before Minho let out a sharp cry, and Chan, nearly dropping the boy at the sudden noise, began frantically searching over his body to see what was wrong. It wasn’t until seconds later when Minho cried out, “You’re squishing him! He can’t breathe!” that Chan realized what the problem was. Letting out a deep breathe in relief that no serious harm had occurred, Chan adjusted the teary-eyed boy in his arms so that Minho’s stuffed bunny was no longer trapped tightly between their chests and ‘suffocating’.

As quickly as Minho had gotten upset, he seemed perfectly fine once more as Chan started to walk toward the closet again. Opening up the wardrobe doors, Chan angled Minho to be able to better see it contents before letting him pick out what he wanted to wear. After carefully looking over all the new clothes Chan had bought for him, Minho hesitantly pointed to one item. Reaching for the hanger, Chan confirmed that it was what Minho wanted, asking, “This one?” before bringing Minho back to the bed. Maneuvering Minho’s body into the fleecy material, Chan admired what Minho had picked out. Clearly wanting to continue the theme set by his stuffed animal, Minho had chosen a light blue footie with a baby bunnies print. Lined on the inside, Chan could tell Minho that appreciated the exceptional softness on his skin by the contented little hums he was making. After snapping together the leg snaps, Chan stood back to lovingly look down on his baby. He had barely seen a glimpse of Minho’s little side, and Chan was already completely enamored. 

Minho was looking sleepy soft as he docilely rested on the bed, one hand clutching his stuffed bunny and the other steadily drifting up to his mouth. Before Minho had the chance, Chan brought his hand away, saying, “No, no baby. Hands are icky, and we don’t want you getting sick,” before reaching for the pacifier that he had hidden away in his back pocket and letting Minho latch onto it instead. Sucking gently on the paci, Minho’s eyes were closing for longer and longer periods of time. 

Minho was still struggling to keep his eyes open as Chan lifted the covers back and brought Minho to lie underneath them. Chan was just about to move away to let Minho sleep before a small hand reached out and grabbed the back of his sleeve. Understanding that Minho didn’t want to be left alone, Chan sat down on the edge of the bed and delicately smoothed over Minho’s hair, humming a quiet melody as Minho finally closed his eyes and let go of Chan’s shirt. Whispering as to not startle the boy, Chan said, "It's okay, sweetheart. I'm not going anywhere." Assured that Chan wasn’t about to leave again, Minho let himself fall into a peaceful sleep. Still stroking Minho’s hair until his breathing evened out, Chan leaned down to place a kiss on his forehead before easing underneath the covers, Minho instantly cuddling up to his side, and finding sleep as well.


End file.
